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Please do read the whole article. Yes, it is rather long but it is worth it to read. Have fun and I hope it will help you in any way. You can also take the fun quiz!

Farewell, Friend–How to End a Fading Friendship

Breaking up with a friend is a lot like breaking up with a boyfriend – it’s painful to leave behind a life together filled with great memories. But all relationships sometimes run their course, and friendships aren’t always forever.

If you’re finding that it’s time to let go of a fading friendship, learn how to gently cut the cord with these tips.

“Life is partly what we make it, and partly what is made by the friends whom we choose.” -Tehyi Hsieh

A great friendship may be few and far between, but if you’re lucky enough to cultivate one, you are truly blessed. However, just as nothing is guaranteed in life, a long-lasting friendship isn’t either. With life’s ups and downs and each individual’s constant growing and changing, friendships often take a course unanticipated. The bottom line is that while ideally we would like to believe that our friendships will always remain as strong as they’ve been over the years, you will inevitably have to end a few friendships throughout your life. While ending a friendship may be difficult, it will be more difficult in the long run if your friendship becomes counter-productive. It is OK to end a friendship if it’s not contributing anything positive to your life or if they’re simply toxic to your well-being.

Before deciding on whether you truly want to end a friendship, you should first ask yourself some questions:

* Are we just going through a rough patch, like friendships sometimes do?
* Is there a justifiable reason why your friend has started acting the way he or she has?
* Are you willing or able to forgive your friend if the situation was one where you got hurt?
* Does he or she even know how you feel? Does he or she deserve to know?
* Am I compromising my integrity or safety by keeping the friendship?
* Is the basis of our friendship contradictory to what I believe friendship to be?

By asking yourself these questions, you might decide that the friendship is simply not worth saving. Now you have a few options for severing the ties. How you choose to do it is dependant on the circumstances and what kind of friendship you had.

Talk

If you choose to talk to your friend about what is going on or why you don’t think you should remain friends, the key is to be honest without being hurtful, accusatory or condescending. Be truthful but tactful. Let them know exactly why you feel the way you do and give them a chance to respond. You might discover that your friend is unaware of how you’re feeling. But also be prepared that your friend might become defensive, making excuses and unwilling to be civil. The bottom line is to be considerate of their feelings, while, if appropriate, honoring what you had before.

Give It Time

If you’ve had a squabble that you don’t believe to be repairable, you might choose to give it time before completely cutting your friend out of your life. Sometimes you need a moment to cool down, especially if you plan on talking it out. This will help diffuse any kind of talk that might involve yelling, pointing fingers or hurtful words. Giving it time also allows for putting the situation into perspective.

You may end up realizing that the situation was petty or a misunderstanding, and find a renewed faith in the importance of your friendship. You may also choose to not end it, but simply limit contact. There’s nothing wrong with downgrading a friendship to a phone call every so often if you truly care and want to stay in touch with your friend. Just make sure they are on the same page.

Be Busy

If you’re too hurt or fed up and don’t think that telling your friend why you’re severing ties will be beneficial or necessary, then you can choose to avoid him or her all together. If he or she calls you or stops by and asks you if you want to hang out, you can tell him or her that you have prior plans. If they continue to ask, you’ll have to say that you are busy and just can’t make any commitments. This may seem a bit harsh and insensitive, but your friend will probably get the hint. At this point, you might be asked for an explanation, and then you’ll have to decide if you want to give one. If you’re lucky, sometimes friendships just run their course because both of you feel the same way.

Ending a friendship will be painful for awhile. You’ll relive all of your memories and you might end up questioning whether or not the decision was the right one. But just remember that a friendship is meant to enhance your life, not complicate it and that it’s OK to have outgrown each other. A healthy friendship involves trust, loyalty, support and a mutual interest in each other’s well-being. So as an old Nigerian proverb goes, “Hold a true friend with both your hands.”

Do You Fight Fair?

No relationship is perfect, and at some point you’re going to have a confrontation with a coworker, neighbor or someone you love. Disagreements can be a way to respectfully voice your opinion and carefully consider the other person’s thoughts – or they can be an all-out, name-calling fiasco.

Is your fighting style fair or do your quarrels need a referee? Take this fighting fair quiz to find out.

And here’s my result!

You keep your nose clean when it comes to fighting
You’re respectful of other people’s opinions and are willing to compromise. When someone is rude to you, you stay calm, refusing to sink to a low level. You’re too focused on your own life to waste time with petty arguments and sarcastic remarks that won’t solve anything, so you seek out ways to compromise and resolve issues calmly. You have too much self-respect to let people walk all over you, but you don’t lose your temper during a fight either. During an altercation, you’d rather focus your energy on finding a solution that everyone can be happy with. By putting the focus on reaching a compromise, not on who wins or loses a fight, you create bonds of mutual respect between your friends, coworkers and family. If someone you know isn’t so well-versed in the anatomy of respectful debate, make sure they read up on how to fight fair.

My comment? ohhh soo true! That’s me hehe!

How about you? How’s your results?

Thanks for reading!